Dear brethren,
Please note: this is extremely sexually explicit, and to be used only by a married couple or celibate singles wishing for sexual wholeness in a heterosexual marriage.
Sexuality is a powerful and mighty gift from our Lord God Almighty! It is His exclusive idea, and we are most thankful for it. The oneness expressed in sexual celebration in the heterosexual marriage is the very image the Bible uses to describe the oneness of our relationship with Christ. Praise God for this indescribable gift!
It stands to reason that God’s arch nemesis has used this inexpressible Godly gift in significant perverted ways to gain advantage over the human race. In so doing, he often has the upper hand in any ability to fully express this form of physical love.
In her ground breaking book The Power of Sexual Surrender written decades ago, master counselor Dr. Marie Robinson proclaims the vast majority of American women are frigid in some form. This means they are unable to have consistent vaginal orgasms.
The book recounts the tremendous and encouraging success of women who have surrendered to their true sexual identity: the loving and trusting submissive wife. It is the best book on the planet dealing with this vital issue. It would not be published today by any major book group due to the New World Order control to persistently and consistently destroy the nuclear family. The functional family is God’s building block for His kingdom and civilizations since Adam and Eve.
It is also estimated that over 50% of all western women have had some form of sexual trauma. This might take many forms from sexual molestation as a young girl to outright sexual and accompanying emotional abuse as a women. Personally, we here at Walk Worthy believe that percentage is much higher. The result is often unnecessary shame, guilt, and repression never intended by our gracious loving Master.
Abuse takes many forms. Men are just as abused as a victim as women. Maybe more so. Our definition of abuse may shed much light on your own situation. We all know as well that the demonic can play a significant role in sexual problems. Deliverance is a key.
As Christians we know Jesus came to heal and set the captives free. By His wounds, we are healed! Praise God. It is in this spirit that we offer this anonymous account of the sexual healing of one women with the help of her husband. This woman is not a Christian. We have edited this story.
Please send us your stories of sexual healing to share with others. Thank you!
Again, please note: this is extremely sexually explicit, and to be used only by a married couple or celibate singles wishing for sexual wholeness in a future heterosexual marriage.
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When I married my husband, I had no clue how much healing I would have to do before I could become a fully expressed, sexually alive woman.
For decades after we married, my husband helped me heal sexually from earlier traumas. My traumas included an abortion, being told I was lousy in bed, and harboring secret shame and fear because I’d never had a vaginal orgasm.
Worst of all, I was the victim of the severe trauma of being molested by my stepfather between ages 8 and 12. My husband helped me heal from this too.
What I know for sure is that I’m not alone in this. In fact, most women require sexual healing, even if it is from seemingly inconsequential things like societal pressure to look and behave a certain way.
The other thing I know for sure is that if I can heal the trauma I carried around in my body for so many years, other women can too. I believe it is every woman’s birthright to feel and fully enjoy her God given sexuality, and to share her whole sexual being with her husband.
Sadly, this isn’t the case for a lot of us. Too many women have some kind of lingering pain or wounding that blocks our enjoyment of sex. That was true for me, and it nearly ruined my marriage.
There is a lot a husband can do to help his wife heal from sexual trauma. I want to discuss specifically what he can do to help heal her trauma while making love to her in a way that 
can free the natural responsiveness of her vagina.
I use the word vagina, because I know it’s what most people say when they refer to a woman’s genitals. The correct word is vulva. The vulva is the whole female genital system comprising the clitoris, urethra, vagina and cervix. The vagina is merely the canal.
Read on to discover the correlation between an open, responsive vagina and sexual trauma.
Now then, imagine what it would be like to feel… I mean really feel… A wife’s soft, vaginal tissue respond to her husband’s touch? Or to feel her vaginal muscles gently massage his penis?
Husbands love a wife who is responsive in bed, but to be with a woman whose vagina responds to his fingers inside her, or to his penis probing her, will send him over the moon.
Now…how specifically can a husband help his wife heal sexually? Let’s look at how it plays out during intercourse.
Say the two of you are making love and the wife’s vagina contracts and she feels pain. Some women will let you know by saying, “Ouch!” Others will grimace, and others will try to hide or ignore the pain.
It is extremely helpful if the husband is tuned in and paying attention. Men need to understand that, during sex, many women experience discomfort related to unresolved trauma. A woman’s vagina is quite sensitive. She might have little knots and tough tissue in there. Her vaginal walls might have hard ridges.
Husbands: one of the most powerful things you can do when she’s contracting is pause, tune into your heart, direct your love into your body and mind.
It’s important to know that anyone – husband or wife – might dissociate when old trauma gets triggered. Memories may surface, emotions that have been tamped down for years might be released. Body memories can actually cause a person to relive the trauma.
If your spouse does tend to dissociate (or even if they don’t), it’s helpful to discuss in advance how you want to help them heal. You might simply say: “If you ever get to a place where something feels uncomfortable, let me know. I’ll pause and send you my love. All you have to do is receive.”
When she (or even he) gets beyond the discomfort and starts moving again, continue making love as if nothing happened. A husband’s love, understanding and compassion will allow her vagina to become more responsive because it has stopped contracting in fear and is resisting the pain.
Here’s the real beauty of this process: when a woman lets go of the resistance, both stuck emotion and repressed pain are released from her nervous system. Once she lets it go, it’s gone. Her vagina will start to become supple and responsive to his touch. As he massages her tissue, it will plump up and get engorged. She’ll get super turned on and start to enjoy making love like never before. That’s sexual healing.
One way this can happen more quickly is for the husband to become adept at the genital (vulva) massage. It’s a beautiful gift for any wife to receive. And any husband can learn to give their wife this profoundly healing and sensually awakening experience. She’ll love you for it.
It’s often best to incorporate a full body married massage with this.
Massaging this area up inside her vagina can be a profoundly healing experience. But at first can produce tears or other emotional releasing behaviors. We store emotions like shame, upset, fear, grief.
As the emotions release through experienced touching, palpitations and pressure, a woman can release any painful sexual experiences she may have had in the past. With slow, tender ministrations, the her body will heal, allowing her sexual power and confidence to emerge.
I’ve been emotionally processing about sexual and emotional abuse I sustained as a child. It rears its head every decade or so and I realize how much that old trauma still runs my reactions to my life. So I re-examine the experience and how it’s affecting me at various stages of my life.
Now…here is part of the massage.
Have the husband give his wife a warm water foot bath. It helps relax her. He might ask, “Is there anything you want to ask or tell me?”
Have her undress. He then runs his hands up and down the whole of her body which is draped in a towel.
Use organic coconut oil and soon her neck, back, butt, legs and feet will fell relaxed. Have the husband tell the wife how sweet she is, how nice her body is, and how he is fine with her emotionally. Tell her it is safe for her to just let herself go.
During this time, the wife may think a lot about the abuse she suffered. She may feel sorry for the little, defenseless girl (or woman) who was probed and punched. She may then think about how her body is OK. How the abuser was worse off than being born into the circumstances that created his meanness and his sexual deviant behavior. She may forgave him again. No sense being bitter. Let it all go.
Tears may flow but they may be the tears of relief. I’m fine…I’m OK…I’m letting go the upset, she may say aloud or think.
Once the wife feels she has processed the grief enough for the little girl (or grown woman) who never deserved to be sexually violated, beaten, and disrespected, tell your husband you are ready for the deeper massage.
The wife may want some water now. The husband should remind his wife to breathe throughout the massage.
The husband then starts to massage her front. He has oiled her tummy, breasts, and genitals. Stroke her sternum and then start a rhythm from her breasts to her tummy to her genitals — up and down — down and up. With each successive path becoming more sensual.
Reminded the wife to breathe.
The husband should then open his wife’s legs and prop them up on pillows. He then will use a wonderful and natural organic avocado oil in the genital area. Then he fully massages her vulva, from the outside and working his way slowly in.
He should ask if it is OK to enter his wife’s vagina with one finger. She should respond with a yes when ready. It will feel very good. Her husband’s touch will feel safe now.
Not for ever a second should the wife feel at this time like her husband is trying to do anything other than give her body the pleasuring loving orgasmic release that reboots a woman’s nervous system.
He gently and creatively massages all the parts of her vulva.
The husband reapplies lube when needed.
Now, the wife is open to her husband! He has lovingly opened her.
The husband will now spend a lot of time massaging her G-Spot in ways that careful married lovers will use by vulva stroking and erotic massage techniques. This is never just sticking his fingers in and treating it like a penis. Friction. In and out. Out and in. Using the same old piston motion. Never. Ever.
The loving and gracious husband will go so far as to use the come hither, or windshield wiper moves. He will learn the correct pressure to create that melting feeling that only comes with erotic and married G-Area touch.
As the husband strokes and presses, the wife will let go. She may even have a squirting orgasm!
The wife will fully process her emotions. The husband will help rub them away. And in the process, sexual healing will happen!
Yes, the wife may have some orgasms. But that is not “the goal.” The goal is to let this marvelous man, the husband, support the wife in working through her past tragedies that may keep hindering her life in sneaky ways.
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Again, let us know how the Lord uses this in your sexual healing! You may view married massage videos here. Also, additional helps on sex can be viewed here.
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Please comment on this post right below. Feel free to write and proclaim your leadings in the Spirit in an honorable fashion.
Your friend and brother in fighting the good fight,
Marc
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Saints, we’re one day closer to Home, and Him! Love Him wholeheartedly!
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You may view our Archives here: DEAR BRETHREN – ARCHIVES; Complete Archives. May our Father richly bless you with His grace, through Jesus Christ our Lord, in order to walk worthy of His name.
Please comment on this post right below. Feel free to write and proclaim your leadings in the Spirit in an honorable fashion.
Marc White, Director, Walk Worthy Ministries, www.WalkWorthy.org
